FFXI LGBT Community, Who Are You?

Sounds antiquated, and it'd take quite a lot to trigger any retrospection on the issue. I know that racism exists, but I also know that what quite a lot of people think is racism is just an inability to separate correlation and causation

This is a terrible example, I have no words. Can I just say that many of my friends are asian and most of them aren't into other asian men. And Friday night is Dragon, aka asian night, and we don't go to it because our physical interests lie elswhere.

What you are saying is equatable to saying that you not being attracted to women sexually is sexist.

Had this conversation in here a few months ago. I've been called racist for not being particularly attracted to black guys (oddly enough, only by other white people). :/ I think it cheapens the issue of racism. It might be poor form to go around advertising that kind of information, but I don't really see the point in lying if a friend asks me why I'm not fapping to pics of [insert actor's name here]. "Dude, that's like... racist." Drunk conversations are the best.

The major thing missing from that list is the unfortunate way that many gay men (or honestly just people in general, as Serj pointed out) seem to believe that the prejudice they have faced in the past somehow makes them infallible when it comes to other social issues. Being gay does not magically redeem you for being a misogynist, a transphobe, or even a homophobe. Being black doesn't stop you from being racist, and being a woman doesn't stop you from being... Michele Bachmann. People need to stop assuming that their minority status puts them on the cutting edge of progressivism.

There is a difference between sexual preference and racism, I agree. However, the issue arises when sexual preference is justified via racist assumptions ultimately becoming a smoke-screen for racism itself.

E.g. I won't sleep with X ethnicity(because they are typically poor and uneducated).

It's an excellent read regarding sub-culture discrimination. He is a light complected half Cuban half African-American, and is able to pass for white, black and latino. The book talks about internal discrimination within minority cultures and the facades of discrimination he is able to see that he otherwise would not, if not for his mixed ethnicity.

The book also discusses the lengths minorities will go to advance one's position in society.

Ikr, the Latino in me makes me so adorkable. :3

My two cents:
There is a difference between attraction preferences and discrimination.
I don't believe that it's wrong to say, "I don't like light skin colour or lankiness." or things of that sort, but there is something wrong in saying, "I don't like [group name here]."

Speaking of which I'll be hitting up the this hiphop/ranchero-latino bar today! oh joy! Gotta practice mi espanol.

"Donde esta mi coche estacionado? Estoy muy tomado!"

Deciding to dress "normal" or go full on botas y cowboy hat!

I'm black and a...fairly straight woman, but the preference thing even applies to straight people. I remember when I was in the single pool, and seeing guys who I was attracted to (white guys) had on their profiles "no black chicks".

And of course, I'd be like "oh, but why? RACIST!" It took me a while to understand that while I had my own preferences, others had theirs, and it was okay.

I didn't know that it was possible to find Latinos unattractive either. A lot of the ones I've run into were really attractive (but alas, gay, LOL).

Keep the thread alive. <3

Hope it's okay to add my 2 cents...

Having preferences is fine, but I think there's a problem when you say "I'm not attracted at all to <incredibly broad ethnic group>" because you're undermining the huge amount of diversity in the group. Two people who are both black/latin/etc can have hugely different facial features and skin tones (and the same goes for caucasians...).

I also think maybe you're weighing too much importance on how someone looks. If you met a person who was an absolute perfect match for you in personality, but also happened to be black (or whatever group you say you're not attracted to), would that really be a deal-breaker? If so, I think something's wrong there...

I actually think that those who say they're not attracted to a certain race at all regardless of everything else is probably saying it due to past experiences with others of that race.

Like those who say they're not attracted to blacks--I can rattle off all the stereotypes that are out there, and all of them would be exactly why. I'll admit that I was this way with black guys (the "hey ma" smoking weed and pants 3 inches off the ground kinds) for a bit. Then I got older and realized that if my husband said "hey ma" to me, he'd get the same treatment, regardless of race.

Those kinds just need to open their eyes to many possibilities in life. Whether or not they choose to is on them--they'll be old and alone.

See I'm kinda the opposite. I at first never thought NO BLK or NO LTN was racist. But that might be partially because when I first started dating all my friends, myself included, were from South Orange County.

So it never really phased me as them, possibly, being racist until I started hearing them make racist comments about other minority groups e.g. blacks, azns and ltns.

Comments/jokes about attire, education, income, the way they talk were common and I honestly went a long with it for a long time. Then as I got older my group of friends became more diverse and I was like omg a lot of my friends are racist. They would go out of their way not to go to an event because a black or asian was present.

So going back to what I said in the prior post, it was their "sexual preference" was merely a smoke-screen so to speak, at least partially.

I can't say I'm all that familiar with the gay community at large, but from some of the friends I have it seems like gay men can be notoriously shallow/picky about race when it comes to dating.

I don't really understand... if you're already in a minority group (that's largely oppressed, might I add), why would you want to shrink your pool of potential dates even further with something arbitrary like skin color? :/

If you're not attracted to something you're not attracted to something.

Okay... and do you only date people who match your perfect ideal of beauty? I doubt it. If someone being a certain ethnicity alone is an instant deal-breaker, that goes way beyond just having "preferences."

I agree, its not racism, its prefrence. Everyone has them.

I feel compelled to pose a juxtaposition involving obesity, its statistical prevalence, and peoples' proclivity for avoiding it in prospective partners, but I'm feeling lazy

*** yeah unintentional alliterations

To be fair to the argument, though, obesity and mesomorph/ectomorph/whatever body classifications aren't part of the traditional 'protected classes' of society. I do understand what you mean, though, in getting to the root of the issue of whether (on a personal level) the given individual is acting out of innocent preference, and not out of intolerant prejudicial action. I would think that has to deal with each person and how they honestly feel, should they analyse their own behaviours.

Either way, I personally feel everyone has their right to their own preferences, but as I get older my I do notice my tastes change and expand--so I feel that those who aren't willing to give someone a chance simply because of their looks (or general classifications of looks) are only cheating themselves out of wonderful experiences. :p

EDIT: It is also possible, that as I get older, my standards are just rapidly falling, but I like to think of it as "expanding my tastes". ^_-

ftfy


I don't think that's totally the same though... obesity is a sign of unhealthiness and is also an extreme condition (I mean, there's a big difference between being obese and just being "out of shape"). Weight management is also something people themselves are personally responsible for.

Again, I don't think having preferences is bad, people just shouldn't hold onto them as requirements.

Ultimately no one is going to admit they're racist. That said ,no one is going to admit they have racist ideologies which, may or may not, form justifications for their "sexual preference."

To say that sexual preference is never based on racist assumptions is naive. You need look no farther than the Spanish-Latin American caste system and see how it still impacts many Latin-Americans. Again I'm not saying all but there is a such thing as "sexual racism."

EDIT: Some people, not just gays, need to least basic tact and manners and how to politely reject people. Life isn't some sequel to Mean Girls. If you're not into someone you dont need to be so audacious and be NO BLK, NO FEMS, NO AZN. Just be like "not a match,""I'm currently talking to someone," or "I'm just looking for friends at the moment."

I happen to like the fluffy ones. I'm always cold, so they make good blankets. Just saying.

When the hell did this conversation turn to this? Lets be happy!! I <3 everyone, except Baconwrap, hes the devil...text me boo~

If by the devil you mean Anna Wintour from The Devil Wears Prada hell yes!!!

Change of pace! Real lesbians watching lesbian porn (not explicit but I won't post it directly just in case :3): http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PJvYprLDcRs

I was just barely to be able to see this b/c I was on the road on my cell. Gold Star Lesbian! New vocab word/term for the day!

I kinda lol'd at this. The reason I lol'd is because I've NEVER heard a guy admit he was drunk; haha. I've usually get excuses like, "Es porque estoy cansado."

That can go super tacky.
Super fast; haha.

I generally go sin cowboy hat; haha.


Yup, yup, yup! It's always fun for me to be the big spoon. :3
Thank you, good ma'am for allowing us to envelop your people in awesome warmth.
#SpoonPositionist

Soo gay day at Galveston, TX this weekend anyone going?

@Scrumpet we didn't do the cowboy bar. We did west Hollywood. My friend paid some drag queen for her tiara. Then was sporting it all night lol

YES.
DO WANT.
I'm not entirely sure if I can go though! I'll keep you updated!

Any gay folk on Odin?

Don't think I've seen any Odin peeps in here for quite some time. Welcome all the same. :]

In other news, I might cry the next time I see an elderly bush being blown dry in the locker room. I'm worried that the image will be forever burned into my memory, along with the smell of moth balls and cigarettes. :C I miss college.