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Random Politics & Religion #00
Bahamut.Kara
Serveur: Bahamut
Game: FFXI
Posts: 3544
By Bahamut.Kara 2015-06-10 14:32:59
Maybe she wants to paint, study rare coins, go out with girlfriends, play ffxi, or a thousand other activities that have nothing to do with going to the city and seeing boys. She might. I would actually like to see those activities reinforced at that age rather than 'boys.' Perhaps the problem lies more with the pressure parents put on their kids to get married and have kids of their own rather than worrying about being sexist.
Me too. I think it says a lot of things about the parents in this situation being potentially disconnected from their daughters life.
Having a mother basically tell you you're going to start spending your free time seeing boys sounds
A) boring
B) slightly creepy
C) no aspirations for her to do anything productive on the weekend
I don't know about others but my weekends were busy (sports, a job, homework, clubs, etc) in high school and any free time I had I wanted to spend with friends, boyfriend (who I did not meet in the city while seeing boys), or alone.
Valefor.Sehachan
Serveur: Valefor
Game: FFXI
Posts: 24219
By Valefor.Sehachan 2015-06-10 14:33:44
I'm not trying to sound like a prude. I just think it's possible to have an interest in your budding sexuality without adults tacitly encouraging it as the main course of your life's actions despite outwardly encouraging you to shun and repress it.
Is there a worse time in life than being a teenager? It's probably why so many of us lament "youth being wasted on the young". We'd love to do those younger years over with the knowledge we have now. We'd have even more fun! (of, *ahem*, lots of kinds) I'm the first to have talked about how people push on me to marry have children(my father even tried to arrange me marriages when I was little. However, the fact that teens are interested in sexuality(with whichever gender)is not driven by anything other than their hormones.
By fonewear 2015-06-10 14:33:59
You guys are sounding like old prudes.
Teenagers have a strong drive to explore sexuality and that's all there is to it. Some mature earlier and some later, some are proactive while other are shy about it, but that is all. Jeez.
Care to tell me where said teenagers are...
He's asking for a friend.
I don't really like teenagers anymore I'm too old for the craziness.
Leviathan.Chaosx
Serveur: Leviathan
Game: FFXI
Posts: 20284
By Leviathan.Chaosx 2015-06-10 14:35:06
By fonewear 2015-06-10 14:36:07
Wait a minute there is a girl on the internet someone alert the proper authorities.
This is a day that will live in infamy.
Now if there was only a way people could prove their "gender identity" on the internet....
Leviathan.Chaosx
Serveur: Leviathan
Game: FFXI
Posts: 20284
By Leviathan.Chaosx 2015-06-10 14:36:53
Now if there was only a way people could prove their "gender identity" on the internet.... POIDH.
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By Ramyrez 2015-06-10 14:37:31
Maybe she wants to paint, study rare coins, go out with girlfriends, play ffxi, or a thousand other activities that have nothing to do with going to the city and seeing boys. She might. I would actually like to see those activities reinforced at that age rather than 'boys.' Perhaps the problem lies more with the pressure parents put on their kids to get married and have kids of their own rather than worrying about being sexist.
Me too. I think it says a lot of things about the parents in this situation being potentially disconnected from their daughters life.
Having a mother basically tell you you're going to start spending your free time seeing boys sounds
A) boring
B) slightly creepy
C) no aspirations for her to do anything productive on the weekend
I don't know about others but my weekends were busy (sports, a job, homework, clubs, etc) in high school and any free time I had I wanted to spend with friends, boyfriend (who I did not meet in the city while seeing boys), or alone.
Honestly, I can see both sides of it here.
It is normal for teens that age to begin having sexual thoughts and desires, and we are really no more than a generation removed from even basic public acknowledgement of homosexuality. We still struggle withthe duality of sexuality overall, both glorifying it whilst still treating it as taboo. And the mother certainly intended no offensive or presumption. She was just speaking from her own experiences and expectations she's come to have as a part of "regular" society.
It's just that, well, things change. And younger people are near always the first to embrace it.
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By Ramyrez 2015-06-10 14:39:25
Wait a minute there is a girl on the internet someone alert the proper authorities.
This is a day that will live in infamy.
Now if there was only a way people could prove their "gender identity" on the internet....
Yeah. For all you know I'm Jennifer Lawrence.
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Caitsith.Zahrah
Serveur: Caitsith
Game: FFXI
By Caitsith.Zahrah 2015-06-10 14:44:15
Maybe she wants to paint, study rare coins, go out with girlfriends, play ffxi, or a thousand other activities that have nothing to do with going to the city and seeing boys. She might. I would actually like to see those activities reinforced at that age rather than 'boys.' Perhaps the problem lies more with the pressure parents put on their kids to get married and have kids of their own rather than worrying about being sexist.
Well, maybe it does have to do with the parenting and having different areas of interests to explore.
Anecdotal, but I think there was more interest in finding an identity in the realm of "girly-dom" from ages eleven to thirteen that gradually falls away as you reach a level of comfort/affirmation with yourself. That level of comfort ends up being the cue to return to/rediscover your prior hobbies/interests or expand them. I think it happens at different ages with different girls, maybe in different atmospheres among different peers?
I can't think of too many girls who reached high school that were overly enthusiastic about and emphasized use make-up and constantly preening. I remember there being more "So-and-so is cute!" and passing notes with boys in middle school than anything else. Then again, I graduated in a class just a hair under 150 where most of us all knew each other from extracurriculars from early-childhood on. Maybe we all knew each other enough not to give a flying ***, given the span of time we all interacted with each other made us all overly comfortable with each other (guys and gals alike)?
I think I need to backread to see what all this hub-bub is about.
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By fonewear 2015-06-10 14:45:42
I had friends once and it was awesome !
By Ramyrez 2015-06-10 14:46:34
I graduated in a class just a hair under 150 where we most of us all knew each other from extracurriculars from early-childhood on.
150? That's like 162% of my graduating class! (93)
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By fonewear 2015-06-10 14:47:21
I don't remember high school I was a traditional non conforming conformist !
By Ramyrez 2015-06-10 14:49:01
I don't remember high school I was a traditional non conforming conformist !
So you spent it blasted-drunk at woods parties is what you're saying.
By fonewear 2015-06-10 14:50:58
I don't remember high school I was a traditional non conforming conformist !
So you spent it blasted-drunk at woods parties is what you're saying.
Only on the weekends !
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Valefor.Sehachan
Serveur: Valefor
Game: FFXI
Posts: 24219
By Valefor.Sehachan 2015-06-10 14:51:58
When I went to school dating started in middle school, so by 14 all girls already acted like "experts"(not so much boys who looked like babies so everyone dated older guys...sorry boys).
Also I think I mentioned it before but there's this strange ritual where I live which repeates every saturday night:
girls gather in the main square of the town and stand there even for hours doing absolutely nothing, while boys circle around them on scooters, and I mean literally circle aroud them cause they do laps around town on their bikes trying to pick up girls. As the night goes on some girls have been picked up while others unimpressed by guys leave with their friends. Then everyone find themselves again at the clubs where they dance and drink..
Ah, youth...
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By fonewear 2015-06-10 14:53:21
Scooters you can't pick up a girl on a scooter... I reckon you'd get your man card taken away !
By Ramyrez 2015-06-10 14:56:02
I don't remember high school I was a traditional non conforming conformist !
So you spent it blasted-drunk at woods parties is what you're saying.
Only on the weekends !
Eh. I never got invited. Being visibly into sci-fi and fantasy (and, later, a band geek) is a quick route to being sort of...not really picked on after a while, but just sort of invisible. Didn't matter really, probably would have ruined me to start drinking heavily that early.
The nice thing was, though, once high school started, we all kind of got along for the most part (except a few specific rivalries; for instance, one of my rivals is doing 10+ years for dealing heroin and I think it's hillarious). By senior year we all had a blast together and I did get invited to that stuff, though I was actually too busy to go most of the time.
...because I was also that weirdo that started hanging out with college kids way too early and, uh. Started drinking with them, instead.
Leviathan.Chaosx
Serveur: Leviathan
Game: FFXI
Posts: 20284
By Leviathan.Chaosx 2015-06-10 14:56:29
Anecdotal, but I think there was more interest in finding an identity in the realm of "girly-dom" from ages eleven to thirteen that gradually falls away as you reach a level of comfort/affirmation with yourself. That level of comfort ends up being the cue to return to/rediscover your prior hobbies/interests or expand them. I think it happens at different ages with different girls, maybe in different atmospheres among different peers? I would guess this return to hobbies/interests really only occurs though once you've abide by the social pressure to find a mate.
By Ramyrez 2015-06-10 14:56:38
Scooters you can't pick up a girl on a scooter...
Well Americans can't because we're too fat. We can't fit two people on a Vespa.
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By fonewear 2015-06-10 14:58:21
The people I see at bars etc use backwards baseball caps to try to get women. I'm not sure if it works but they are trying at least !
The amount of bros I see frightens my sensibilities. And I wish someday the bros would build their own bro bar.
By Ramyrez 2015-06-10 14:59:00
Anecdotal, but I think there was more interest in finding an identity in the realm of "girly-dom" from ages eleven to thirteen that gradually falls away as you reach a level of comfort/affirmation with yourself. That level of comfort ends up being the cue to return to/rediscover your prior hobbies/interests or expand them. I think it happens at different ages with different girls, maybe in different atmospheres among different peers? I would guess this return to hobbies/interests really only occurs though once you've abide by the social pressure to find a mate.
I don't know about that, my interests helped me find my mate in the first place.
That said, I can give anecdotal creedence to girls paying more attention to you once you're actually taken. At least in my case. Including the girl I was infatuated with before I met my now-wife.
But I behaved!
...which is damned impressive for a seventeen-year-old boy.
By Ramyrez 2015-06-10 14:59:39
use backwards baseball caps to try to get women
I don't so much look down on backward hats, but for ***'s sake you tools bend the brim and take the sticker off, you look idiotic.
Bahamut.Ravael
Serveur: Bahamut
Game: FFXI
Posts: 13640
By Bahamut.Ravael 2015-06-10 15:00:16
The people I see at bars etc use backwards baseball caps to try to get women. I'm not sure if it works but they are trying at least !
Probably more successful than fedoras.
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By Ramyrez 2015-06-10 15:00:20
The amount of bros I see frightens my sensibilities. And I wish someday the bros would build their own bro barTitanic and coast around the North Atlantic.
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By Ramyrez 2015-06-10 15:00:58
The people I see at bars etc use backwards baseball caps to try to get women. I'm not sure if it works but they are trying at least !
Probably more successful than fedoras.
Which is truly unfortunate.
*** dudebros ruining perfect good headgear.
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By fonewear 2015-06-10 15:01:53
The odd part is that the bar (heavy craft selection) I frequent doesn't really cater towards bros but they are migrating like giraffes looking for Coors Light in the promise land !
Bahamut.Ravael
Serveur: Bahamut
Game: FFXI
Posts: 13640
By Bahamut.Ravael 2015-06-10 15:04:33
The people I see at bars etc use backwards baseball caps to try to get women. I'm not sure if it works but they are trying at least !
Probably more successful than fedoras.
Which is truly unfortunate.
*** dudebros ruining perfect good headgear.
Dudebro wears a beret.
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Leviathan.Chaosx
Serveur: Leviathan
Game: FFXI
Posts: 20284
By Leviathan.Chaosx 2015-06-10 15:05:07
Anecdotal, but I think there was more interest in finding an identity in the realm of "girly-dom" from ages eleven to thirteen that gradually falls away as you reach a level of comfort/affirmation with yourself. That level of comfort ends up being the cue to return to/rediscover your prior hobbies/interests or expand them. I think it happens at different ages with different girls, maybe in different atmospheres among different peers? I would guess this return to hobbies/interests really only occurs though once you've abide by the social pressure to find a mate.
I don't know about that, my interests helped me find my mate in the first place.
That said, I can give anecdotal creedence to girls paying more attention to you once you're actually taken. At least in my case. Including the girl I was infatuated with before I met my now-wife.
But I behaved!
...which is damned impressive for a seventeen-year-old boy. I was referring to girls more than boys in that case, but I could see how one would apply to boys as well.
I was picturing a scenario in which boys who don't date, or don't date often focus their attention on learning science and math to make money (if they don't end up committing suicide or homicide first). Whereas girls would try to learn and pursue other things, only to put that part of their lives on hold once they've 'settled down' with someone.
There might be a case of some girl who has advanced herself through life, made a successful career, etc. and doesn't have a boyfriend, but I'm not aware of such an instance offhand.
Valefor.Sehachan
Serveur: Valefor
Game: FFXI
Posts: 24219
By Valefor.Sehachan 2015-06-10 15:05:32
I prefer people who take off their hat, whichever it is, when they enter a place.
By Ramyrez 2015-06-10 15:06:02
The people I see at bars etc use backwards baseball caps to try to get women. I'm not sure if it works but they are trying at least !
Probably more successful than fedoras.
Which is truly unfortunate.
*** dudebros ruining perfect good headgear.
Dudebro wears a beret.
And eats his:
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