Random Thoughts.....What Are You Thinking?

Yes, all the time.

Moreso when I was younger, not as much as I age. Mainly because I don't like feeling the things I feel after we break up.

Although I will have to admit, the last few times I broke up with somebody, it wasn't so bad.

That's very possible.

Any sort of medical treatment requires a good rapport with your treating sources, and psychological care even more so than physical. That's one of the biggest barriers out there to finding a psychological profession, even if you have the means to afford it; finding one right for you. Especially when it comes to therapists and counselors. Psychologists/psychiatrists for diagnostic and medication purposes aren't as difficult, but a good therapist or counselor that's on the same wavelength with you can be really hard to find, unfortunately.

Unfortunately, because of human nature, you can't control which emotions you feel towards any other one person. You feel then all. It can't be helped. At one point or another, if you spend any substantial amount of time with someone else, you will feel every emotion about or towards them.

The only choices you make is this world that have any consequence is what you chose to express to that other person, everything else is, by default, repressed.

Most people don't understand the nature of emotion and they are horrified by them and they can't seem to control them so they feel out of control and then they lose control and the one emotion they tried hardest repressing is the one that takes over.

At least a third of all women killed are killed by their intimate partners, the one that promised to love them forever and ever no matter what.

Am I a "usual suspect"?

Either way I will lay something down for you to maybe think about.

You gotta love yourself before you can experience real love.

You cried because your subconscious realized that you don't love yourself, you are afraid of being alone, and that until you recognize both of those things you will chase after the wrong idea of what love is and end up right back in that pit.

Or the black hole represents a butthole and your Dream is trying to tell you that you are gay.

Seriously? You have to love yourself? Someone explain that to me, or is this where those Julia Robert movies come in to play?

I really dislike this old axiom. I don't think it's accurate at all and actually can be quite detrimental to people with depression because it engenders a bit of a "I don't love me, so everyone else must hate me too" mindset.

I've had to help people combat that mindset, actually. It's really tough. Speaking from firsthand experience, that sentiment is actually really damaging.


I...well, I guess that's one theory. I mean, I'm not saying it's a good one but...if I've got to pick between the two, I guess I'm going with the gaping black anus theory.

It's not that you can't experience real love, but you can't have a functional relationship without caring for yourself first. You can't expect the partner to pick up the mess you are, not indefinetely at least.

No... you can also wring your hands menacingly, hunch your back and grow a sinister handlebar mustache...

Hey...waitaminnit...

This sounds a lot like...

No.

I'm content with myself. Before last night, I had my doubts into knowing what the concept of "love" is. After last night, those doubts went away.

I think my biggest pain is that I can never apologize to the woman my subconscious conjured up. I just don't know.

I think I'm just going to revert back into my shell again. It's not that this discussion was bad or anything, it's just that this hurt isn't going away, it's actually getting worse as people talk about it and their experiences.

Maybe this is a bottling up effect, and the bottle can just take so much before it explodes.

I hate it, I hate it all.

It'll pass, it always does.

Just like a kidney stone.

No matter how *** up you are, there's someone out there who's at least as crazy as you.

One more level.. *feels tired*

/spins around to look behind himself

WHERE!?

phew... you're wrong...no one is as evil as me or he would have already been behind me with a garrote to eliminate the competition...

This is your fatal flaw!

She will be far more devious than a direct attack!

All of this assumes that the person disliking themselves is unable to reason or have insight.

You can know you are deserving of love objectively without subjectively feeling you are. Taken to a more severe extreme, you're talking about the difference betwixt delusion and hallucination. You can be psychotic and still understand that what you're experiencing isn't actually there.

You can feel a complete and utter lack of self worth while still realize you actually have worth.

/continues to watch people psych-analyze him.

I just don't know if I should be concerned, pissed off at myself for starting this all, or amused.

Ok let's change the wording. It's not that you have to love yourself, but you have to accept yourself. You can't keep a relationship while pushing someone away because you don't want to expose your true self.

My apologies then.

/goes back to his corner

That's not what I said at all though.


I, for one, am speaking in generalities at this point. I do think if you're having difficulty expressing yourself emotionally or having difficulty coping with emotions you should seek professional treatment in the fashion most suited to you personally.

I'd be amused. You're probably feeling totally different then what we're all thinking you're feeling.

I'm going to come steal yours and Lina's Lego bricks.